Too hot for Netflix? This steamy movie is so sexy most streaming services won’t carry it.

Dick Rambo and Cornelius Whacker.

​Every so often, a movie comes out that pushes the boundaries of public decency and sets off a debate on the difference between erotica and pornography. This year, that movie is likely to be Big Butts and Huge Nuts, a raunchy entry that carries a punitive triple X rating. 
 
For now, most mainstream streaming services are passing on the film, which recently changed its title from Massive Dicks and Nasty Chicks, in a bid to curry favor with more conservative entertainment outlets. Even with this update, the producers were left with a harsh, cold NO. 
 
If you’re wondering what the movie is about, we can tell you this—it does not have a traditional plot. Instead, the filmmakers rely on a semi-realistic portrayal of people having sex with each other. Critics who have seen Big Butts and Huge Nuts claim the actors, although actually engaging in intercourse and other sex acts, are not a good depiction of what average people look like as they copulate. For example, they point out that the male penises are almost comically large and that the action is “closer to acrobatic” than what you might see if you were, for instance, a fly on the wall at an orgy.
 
To this point, actors Dick Rambo and Cornelius Whacker have very few lines, and the ones they have seem improvised, such as: “Unnngh!” and “Yeah! That’s right! Oh yeah!” But according to Whacker, dialogue is not the point. 
 
“The director didn’t really give us any lines,” he tells us. Rambo adds, “It’s more like they tell us what to do sexually—which positions and stuff like that. The lines we have are just kind of made up in the moment.”
 
If one had to describe the plot of Big Butts and Huge Nuts, it would be that several men enter a warehouse and start fucking women who are conveniently there. They use couches and a random bed that’s just sitting around, for apparently no reason, until you figure out the reason is to have sex on it. The nudity, full penetration shots, and visible boom microphones are considered by many to be disqualifying features for high-end services like Amazon Prime, Netflix, and others. But is this fair, or just a matter of taste in art?
 
Says Naomi Cumbell, who appears in most of the movie, “Who let you in here?” One of her co-stars, Sheila von Tittenstorm agrees, “Yeah, who let you in here?”
 
We may never know the answer to that question, but one theory is that we just walked into the warehouse and started talking to people in between the times when they were fucking each other. Even more likely, though, is the theory we just mentioned, where we walked in, etc. 
 
Will Big Butts and Huge Nuts ever make it to a streaming service that shows movies that aren’t just people fucking? And, more important, does it count if we cast it onto our 85-inch t.v. and pretend we just clicked on Netflix and there it is? Once again, we may never know. But one thing’s for sure—believing in yourself is everything and family comes first. 
 

Tee shirts that are banned from streaming.