Illinois state flag competition. Can we still enter?

It recently came to our attention that a contest was held to design a new state flag for Illinois. Usually, when one of the United States makes such a change, we are contacted immediately for our input. But this time, something must have gotten mixed up.
 
Not to worry, Illinois, we are now entering our own designs for your consideration. We are also using the required format, so you’re welcome. Just let us know which one you pick.

FLAG ONE: 

Relationship to Illinois: We’re a satirical magazine based in Illinois. Is that enough? Why are you asking? Are you a cop?
 
Explain the meaning behind your flag: We wanted to have a depiction of Abraham Lincoln getting carjacked, but we didn’t have the skill to pull that one off. 

FLAG TWO: 

Relationship to Illinois: I am a ten-year-old kid with special needs who maybe you’ll feel sorry for and make his flag the winner? No? All right. Same answer as before.
 
Explain the meaning behind your flag: In this one, we played with the famous SNL sketch featuring “Bill Swerski’s Super Fans.” Only this time, we made it about the massive crime in Chicago. Sorry to the rest of the state, but there’s only so much room on a flag so you’re in on this too.

FLAG THREE:

Relationship to Illinois: Do we really have to keep answering this question? 
 
Explain the meaning behind your flag: We forgot about the corruption, so we made this flag about that. 

FLAG FOUR:

Relationship to Illinois: It’s complicated. Dating we guess? Late night hookups and booty calls mostly. 
 
Explain the meaning behind your flag: We added something about cornfields to represent the state outside Chicago. 

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