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The best and worst report

America's best and worst cocktails.

8/21/2019

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Picture
Tom Cruise wouldn't serve a penis stirred vodka shooter.
Nobody ever says no to getting drunk (unless you’re a freak), but you may want to say no to some of America’s worst cocktails.
 
The Intergalactic Business Report recently did a deep dive into our country’s hottest bars to uncover some of the very best and very worst drinks. See them below: 
 
BEST: Vesper.
WORST: Butt plug selzer.
 
BEST: Gin Fizz.
WORST: Shit water on ice.
 
BEST: Peppermint Pattie.
WORST: Crème de Menthe with mild ass drippings. 
 
BEST: Poloma.
WORST: Bung cup with a cucumber garnish.
 
BEST: Finger stirred Negroni.
WORST: Penis stirred vodka shooter.
 
BEST: Jonn the Beachcomber.
WORST: John Fabrizio’s frumunda cheese cocktail sandwich.
 
BEST: Old Fashioned.
WORST: The super old-fashioned: Grandma’s ballsack infused copper ale.
 
BEST: Poloma.
WORST: Pube strained Tequilla with a lemon twist. 

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  • Home
  • About
  • Business
  • Culture
  • Insights
  • Best and worst
  • Hidden brand messages
  • Intergalactic thoughts
  • Mommy's Drunk again
  • Up for grabs
  • Secret Report
  • The best of IBR