1. The “office bully” seems to always get whatever she wants from your boss, while the hard-working staff members are ignored. 2. Your boss constantly holds “live or die” contests in which two employees are put in a conference room and told that they may only leave after one of them is dead. 3. Your one on one meetings are streamed live to a Japanese fetish site where business men masturbate to Americans having meetings with their boss. 4. Once a month, your boss calls all team members into a room where he locks the door and paces back and forth with a machete and keeps asking who the fucking snitch is. 5. You’re asked to drink urine as a sign of loyalty. 6. Since your first day of work you have never left the office because armed guards will shoot you if you try to escape. 7. Larry Understedd, the office jokester, shoots people if they don’t laugh. He also hides in the coat closet and shoots people before they even get a chance to laugh. 8. You are given a concoction of drugs each morning and then you just wake up the next day at home and have no idea what happened. Then you go back to work and the loop continues. 9. Some of your co-workers are insensitive and forget your birthday. |
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