Men Who Have One of These Are Less ‘Dateable,’ Study Finds.

Men who have cats are less dateable, according to a recent study. That sounded fishy to us so the Intergalactic Business Report commissioned its own study, which surveyed 8 million women to find what really turned them off. Cats didn’t even make the list.

​Instead, 13 other things were found that made most men completely undateable. If you have any of these, get rid of them now. We list them below:
 
1. A third arm. 

2. An exposed brain. 

3. A dead grandmother in a wheelchair that travels with you everywhere. 

4. A face tattoo that says, “Kill me twice.” 

5. A Klingon mask. 

6. A smaller man who rides in a saddle on your back and gives commands. 

7. A dildo attached to your face. 

8. A small trough around your neck that collects dropped food. 

9. A spider that crawls out of your mouth when you start talking. 

10. A trucker hat that says, “Small dick. Who cares?” 

11. A booger gun. 

12. Full armor. 

​13. A voice that sounds exactly like the woman’s mother.