Breaking geography news: England is an island. Scotland and Wales are just part of it.

In a new Intergalactic Business Report study* remarkable insights about world geography have come to light. 
 
Although the study is thousands of pages, we’ve pulled out a few major findings that we found most news worthy.
 
1. England, which some natives for years believed was a just a tiny country in the southern part of that odd-shaped island north of Europe, is actually much larger, although still very small compared to the United States. England, in fact, comprises anything you find on that island, including areas formerly referred to as “Scotland” and “Wales” in ancient times. 
 
2. The study mentions that people who still consider themselves Welsh or Scottish should not be resentful about this, because it is now an established geographic fact that they are in fact English. 

3. The United States is really just part of Texas. And all Americans should be comfortable referring to themselves as Texans.
  
*Someone typed this into a computer.