My scrotum wrote this column. By Cedric Bigglestone’s scrotum.

The first ever column written by a human scrotum.
 
As a human scrotum, I don’t have a lot to say. But, I was given the opportunity to write a column for the Intergalactic Business Report and I jumped at the chance, even though I can’t really jump. Or walk or speak. But I can write. Kind of. So here I go.
 
If I’m being really honest, Cedric, the human attached to me, does have his hand wrapped up in his scrotum tissue (me) and is typing through it (me), so he is sort of doing the writing. The question is whether I, as a scrotum, am actually writing, or whether Cedric is and is doing so by using his scrotum (me) as a kind of glove and then writing.
 
I guess that’s pretty much all there is to say.
 
Scrotum out.
 
Sincerely, 
 
Cedric's scrotum