Special etiquette edition. Want to be classy? Learn how to give a “compliment booster.”

Neuroscience has taught us that compliments are more powerful than we ever believed. Using them effectively can be the difference between closing a deal/making a friend/getting action and being ostracized/sent to a leper colony/mistaken for a dead celebrity. 
 
To aid you, the Intergalactic Business Report offers you something that goes beyond a regular compliment. Our exclusive “compliment booster” system gives you simple “extra” compliments that “complement” your compliments, making them stronger and more powerful. Just say the nice thing you usually say, and then add one of our boosters. You’re welcome.
 
 
COMPLIMENT YOU GIVE SOMEONE: “I really like your dress.”
ADD THIS COMPLIMENT BOOSTER: “Nice snatch too.”
 
COMPLIMENT YOU GIVE SOMEONE: “That was a great speech. You really have a command of the room.”
ADD THIS COMPLIMENT BOOSTER: “Similar to your speech, I have a great penis. 
And I am relinquishing command of it to you.”
 
COMPLIMENT YOU GIVE SOMEONE: “Did you lose weight?”
ADD THIS COMPLIMENT BOOSTER: “Because your dick looks bigger through your pants.”
 
COMPLIMENT YOU GIVE SOMEONE: “You look amazing. You haven’t aged a day since I last saw you.”
ADD THIS COMPLIMENT BOOSTER: “You must find dead people and eat their hearts to regenerate yourself.”
 
COMPLIMENT YOU GIVE SOMEONE: “There’s my favorite person!”
ADD THIS COMPLIMENT BOOSTER: “My last favorite person is gone because he disappointed me.”
 
COMPLIMENT YOU GIVE SOMEONE: “I love your outfit. You have the best taste in clothes.”
ADD THIS COMPLIMENT BOOSTER: “May I lick the crotch of your pants?”
 
COMPLIMENT YOU GIVE SOMEONE: “I feel like you’re the only one that gets me.”
ADD THIS COMPLIMENT BOOSTER: “Horny. Gets me horny. Me so horny.” (Follow this with a groaning noise.)
 
COMPLIMENT YOU GIVE SOMEONE: “It’s so good to see you again!”
ADD THIS COMPLIMENT BOOSTER: “I was sure you’d be dead by now. Or at least super fat and about to die. But this… This is a surpise!”