Chris Pratt’s “The Terminal List” features so much revenge that viewers may now be in danger of Pratt killing them for their involvement in watching the series. The Intergalactic Business Report’s entertainment team has uncovered an exclusive preview of season two, in which Pratt expands his kill list to a new level. We share with you some highlights of what happens next.
Pratt kills the director.
By the season one finale, Pratt had murdered everyone imaginable, and seemed sated for the moment, but his blood lust is not quenched yet as he turns and kills the cameraman, and, shortly after, the director, both guilty of just sitting there while Pratt’s family was killed.
Pratt kills the writer.
The twisted man who wrote the series is killed next. This piece of shit not only came up with the idea of Pratt’s whole family getting annihilated, but then wrote it down and sold it to the piece of shit producers and money men who green lit it.
Pratt kills all the producers.
The motherfuckers who put up the money and clout for the spectacle of Pratt’s family being killed are all viciously murdered by Pratt. He even chases down the “executive producers” whatever the fuck they are.
Pratt kills all the viewers.
How could they…? How could you just sit there and watch as Pratt’s family was murdered?
Pratt kills the critics who said the series was good and that people should watch.
These miscreants actually encouraged others to watch as Pratt’s family was killed. Unlike Pratt, they could watch the entire series, knowing the end and who did what, and they never told him. They clearly deserve to die.
Pratt kills the ancestors of Auguste and Louis Lumiere.
These dirty bastards whose great great great grandparents (or something like that) were the forebears to the modern movie camera, are also put down for their role in inventing something that would later film Pratt’s dead family. Much of this episode consists of people saying, “What the fuck? You want to kill me why?” and then Pratt holding his head in pain before he executes them.
Pratt goes back to 50 BC to kill Seneca.
Using a time machine invented by his brain, Pratt travels to ancient Rome to destroy the originator of the revenge story, without whom the entire tale of Pratt getting revenge for the death of his family would not exist. Seneca says some stuff in Latin and Pratt doesn’t understand. Then he kills him.
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